Notes: Matt Kahn Retreat, Thursday PM

Here we go, the notes pretty much straight up. My initial impressions are written up here in case you want some context, super interesting stuff… And I’ll probably write plenty of posts later that expound upon this material, because there’s just so much here, very dense. He seems to drop bombs every time he opens his mouth. And I’ll publish them in several posts (as I get around to doing it!), since there’s so much. Enjoy!

This was the opening session on Thursday night from 7:30-9:30. My original flight to San  Jose, CA had me arriving early that afternoon, and I got a notice a couple of days before departure saying it had been cancelled. The airline automatically re-routed me to San Francisco, which is much farther away from the retreat center, and late at night so that I’d miss the opening session. There was a button saying to click for other flight options, so I clicked it. Lo and behold, there was another flight leaving later that arrived to San Jose around 6:30. I had no checked bags, and they have Uber drivers lined up at the airport. I made it to the retreat center, 1440 Multiversity, by about 7:25. I checked in and made my way to the auditorium just a few minutes after he had started. And keep in mind that this guy has been blowing me away for a while now, but since last summer I’ve been listening to his past retreats non-stop. I know first-hand how ridiculously powerful they are, so the feeling was quite surreal that I was actually there, making my way to the auditorium, about to be there in person.

NOTE: He uses certain words interchangeably: the Universe, Source, Life, God, Light, the Divine. If you have any baggage with a certain word or words, just pick one that works for you! The last thing we ever want to get hung up on is a word, as I’ve done a million times before. It’s just a symbol, so always look at what the speaker is pointing to rather than what your meaning is. Because they’re often not the same. And they’re the one that said it anyway. This is such an important thing to be aware of as humans that are always in communication with one another. Okay, here we go…

The theme of the retreat is the title of his upcoming book, How Everything Is Here To Help Us. Everything that comes our way is a gift. And we don’t have to like it. We might want to start to get on the same page as what Life wants for us, though. Because its plan is probably going to win…

Do your best to see the Divine/Light in everyone. Especially those that hurt others and also those that have been hurt, because sometimes it’s not easy to see that they’re God, too. And they’re in the process of awakening just like everyone else.

You’re the only one in your life that has to change. Everyone else is in charge of themselves. Ask what Life is asking you to change.

To stop the pain, we have to go through it honestly. “Yes, I hate this. This sucks.” Or whatever is honest for you. Don’t blame God and don’t ask why, though. It’s a gift. It’s medicine. It’s the fine print before incarnating on earth: pain is a part of growth. Just like after we eat, we have to digest the food. Eating is more fun than digesting. And if we eat a lot, like a whole pizza, it might be great at the time but the digesting part won’t be fun. Same with integrating big spiritual experiences and insights.

The four stages of ego unraveling (not in order) are frustration, loneliness, boredom, and confusion. We just love whatever arises (i.e. the lonely one, the bored one, etc.). Nothing wrong is happening. In fact, it’s right, because all are simply parts of the awakening process.

To love these four, start by simply saying, “I’m here for you.” That’s the beginning of love. Say, “I may not always agree with you, but I’ll never turn my back on you. I’m here for you.” And let the unraveling happen.

Thus we begin to end the war within ourselves by loving the ego. It’s only been trying to protect the inner child, after all. Even when it wants something that’s not good for us, say, “No we’re not going to do that, but thanks for letting me know how you feel.” It’s so honest and permissive. Thus we become love’s guarantee and not the one looking for a guarantee of love. Bam!

The part of you that doesn’t understand in any moment can’t understand. Just let it unravel by loving it. Breathe. It’s not supposed to understand.

It’s ironic that the most selfish thing, the ego, is on the most selfless journey of dissolving to make more room for the soul to come into the body.

Boredom is saying that it’s time for the ego to slow down. Whenever there’s a lack of stimulation, the ego thinks it’s not being valued. And loneliness is underneath all of the other three. Say to the part of you that feels lonely, “I will never leave you.” And by not abandoning loneliness in that manner (i.e. by loving the part of you that feels lonely), you don’t have to be afraid of losing anyone or anything. We’re always gaining and losing stuff. Loss is inevitable but we don’t have to fear it. It’s always making room for something bigger. What do I have to lose in order to gain what I want?

He finished the night by having us constantly say, “Thank God I’m me.” And appreciate that we’re so awake in consciousness. That we feel. That we care. Even though it’s been painful, we’re finally making peace with that. Also we’ve been always wanting to commune with Oneness, but Oneness came to earth to be an individual. And that’s us. “Thank God I’m me.” And we were to say that all the time to ourselves until the next morning. Feels so good!